During the last week of April I gained a tremendous amount of respect for those mommas who have husbands that travel lots for work. You are the women that I should be taking lessons from:)
While Jared was gone my incredible support team stepped into action....
a text just to check
phone calls asking to pick up some groceries
treats left in secret
penned notes in the mail
prayers offered by multitudes
So many kinds words and so many that asked, "are you guys making it?", with a face that expected me to say "nope!" :) But we didn't just 'make it' or 'survive'. We really had a great ten days. Yes, we greatly missed Daddy and were very aware that our family was incomplete, but we lived and loved well. My two year olds were actually well behaved, had less spankings, less time-outs, only a couple of tantrums, etc. How could this be!? So I started evaluating what else was different about our ten days. Perhaps, and very likely, it was the result of many of you praying that my kids would be miraculously well behaved. But perhaps it was a subtle difference that even now I am still sorting out and processing.
Could it have been my attitude? My perspective and expectations? I think to a great degree it was. When awoke in the mornings I knew I had to set my heart's expectation with a little (okay a lot) more patience than I was accustomed to. I was intentional about having much more one-on-one time with my kids in an attempt to fill the gap of daddy time. We moved at a much slower pace (usually a twenty-minutes-late-everywhere pace), but we seemed to get there a little happier.
But the most important factor came every time we climbed into car seats and rocking chairs. "Mommy, sing I Need You." We've sung it a thousand times, but I let me self listen and meditate on the words.
Lord, I need You, oh I need You Every hour I need You My one defense, my righteousness Oh God, how I need You
So teach my song to rise to you When temptation comes my way And when I cannot stand I'll fall on You Jesus You're my hope and stay
Once again I'm being taught by my little people. It's like they were saying, "Mommy, we just need more Jesus!" And I couldn't agree more, we just need more Jesus.
Like every hour...
when I'm cleaning up failed potty training
when someone has a 'boo-boo' every thirty seconds
when we can't find that lost shoe
when another mealtime ends without eating
when someone new is diagnosed with cancer
when I hear of another baby born too soon
We just need more Jesus!
Yes, everything else is worthless when compared with the infinite value of knowing Jesus. For his sake I have discarded everything else, counting it all as garbage, so that I could gain Christ Jesus- Philippians 3:8
Hoping to hold on to this truth for today and days to come. And yes, this post definitely counts as a 'rambling' :)