August 9, 2012

Thankful Thursday

Amazingly patient kiddos while our car was stuck on the side of the road

After a tow and three days at different mechanics, it was decided that our van experienced a supernatural healing as it crossed Jellico Mountain-Praise Jesus! 

Outdoor snacks

Rearranged furniture

Shared, home grown veggies

Journeying On,

August 2, 2012

Thankful Thursday

Our big girl was ready to toss the paci
She (and I) am still questioning the sanity of this decision

Summer freckles

Childhood memories....that can now be my kids memories

Laundry room....because we've 'fed the bed' at least once a day this week

a cool morning for sitting

Journeying On,

July 26, 2012

Thankful Thursday

A party

Excited partiers:)


Adventuring

a musical heart

learning patience
they learn it waiting in line for rides
I learn it waiting to hear from doctors, therapists and insurance:)


Journeying On,

July 20, 2012

When Hope Seems Broken


Early afternoon this symbolic reminder toppled to the floor...it seemed way too fitting for the events that had unfolded throughout the morning.

I logged on to our health insurance account yesterday morning to see if any files had been uploaded about our pending preauthorization for the inpatient feeding program.  And this is what I saw....


Hope was stirred...

But I didn't see one for Ethan....so I called.  After three hours on the phone with the insurance company and the feeding clinic I learned that the doctor to doctor consult had taken place on Wednesday; and that the insurance company was upholding their decision to deny coverage for the inpatient feeding program at Kennedy Krieger Institute.  

After that, more than just our small sign of 'hope' seemed broken...

We will now start the appeal process and perhaps look into the outpatient day program that they have, but it seems like a long road and hard fight; always with more questions than answers.  

When my 'hope' sign came flying off the shelf shortly after, I almost laughed at the irony...

Perhaps I have placed to much hope in a feeding clinic as the miracle answer for my kids, when there is only one place to put hope.  While medical professionals can be a great resource and tool, they are not worthy of affections intended only for our God.  Of course, I'm sad and frustrated that we aren't headed to Baltimore right now, but today my hope is in our Sovereign God who intends only good towards His children.


Thanks to the powerful ministry of the Spirit (and a little superglue), hope is restored as we press on in this journey towards Eternity.  

I am counting on the Lord; 
yes,  I am counting on him.
I have put my hope in his word.
Psalm 130:5

Journeying On,

July 19, 2012

Thankful Thursday

A new found treat....seriously....these are awesome!!

My car cleaning efforts yielded a good crop

A clean plate:)

A shared treat

 Accepted gifts (bites) from a sister

Journeying On,


July 12, 2012

Thankful Thursday

Big muscles and crazy hair

A picture with my kids and a ride enjoyed by all:)

Best kid friendly carts ever at the Handy Manny store (i.e. Lowes)

That this is bolted to the wall since Ethan was sitting on top of it

Heart shaped strawberries found by little eyes

Journeying On,

July 5, 2012

Thankful Thursday

I know....you're thinking I wasn't very thankful last week.
Or perhaps it's more likely that I just told on myself 
because most of you didn't even realize there wasn't 
a 'thankful thursday' last week.
The truth is I was very thankful....I just didn't get it documented.

Library books and movies:)

All kinds of unique creatures....wow, God is creative!

Red shoes

Toddler talk

There's really no picture for the last thing I'm thankful for today.  I tried to think of something, but there's just nothing adequate to express my gratitude for where our family is today versus this time last year.  On July 5th of last year I was taking a very sick little boy to the hospital and we were starting down the road of pre-leukemia, MDS/Monosomy 7 and a bone marrow transplant.  We have experienced a year of amazing healing, grace and strength for our little guy....beyond thankful for this amazing gift!

Journeying On,

June 30, 2012

Feeding Clinic

It's been exactly a year since we packed the kids in the car and drove 10+hrs to Baltimore for a feeding evaluation.  You can read all about it here.  Kennedy Krieger Institute recommended Ethan and Addison for their inpatient program.  It is a 6-8 week feeding program that has them in therapy three times a day, while they are closely monitored by a nutritionist and nurse practitioner and tube feedings are weaned.  We were excited, hopeful that our tube feeding days could come to an end.  But just a few days after being home from our evaluation Ethan became very sick and was diagnosed with MDS/Monosomy 7 (you can read about that  here). Since Ethan has had an amazingly good season of health over the last nine months, we were given the clear by his hematologist to move forward with the feeding clinic.  Then we had to wait for RSV season to end, openings in the clinic and for our insurance to approve it.

First we were told late April, then the end of May, then early July and now late July to early August before they would have two openings.  We were moving forward with early August until last week when they called to say our insurance would not approve the inpatient stay.  It was a total shock; they have been great so far at approving home health visits, tons of evaluations, procedures and therapists, even our evaluation last year at the clinic.

So this week we're feeling a bit discouraged and frustrated by this news.  However, I'm primarily feeling convicted about how little I've taken this to the Lord.  I took for granted that insurance was a done deal since they had covered the evaluation.  I'm ashamed to say I've spent more time being frustrated about our delayed start date messing up summer plans than I've spent time on my knees seeking the Lord's direction and patience for my hurried heart.  My flesh is still wrestling with the timing of this, but my heart fully knows He always has perfect timing.  Praying this heart will trust the Spirit's Truth, especially over the next few weeks.

We are going to do what we can to appeal to our insurance.  Thankfully, the clinic has a team that is used to making appeals and will do this at no expense to us.  The down side of the appeal process is that it could take several months, which could lead us back into RSV season and potentially postpone our inpatient stay until next year....we just don't know yet.

But before we start the appeal process we have one last little window of hope.  A doctor from Kennedy Krieger will call the doctor that made the denial decision to further discuss if the inpatient stay is 'medically necessary' for our kiddos.  After that conversation the insurance doctor who denied our request can change his mind, which would set things back in motion immediately without the long appeal process.  We've been told it will be at least a week before this conversation takes place.  Believe me, we're already praying for some divine intervention to take place:)

I've been doing some reading in Hosea the past few weeks; God does a lot of redeeming in Hosea's story.  Trusting the Lord to redeem my lack of faith and these seemingly troubling circumstances.

Hosea 2:15b I will "transform the valley of trouble into a gateway of hope"


Journeying On,



June 26, 2012

Sensory

Our little man has been working hard in OT (occupational therapy) for the last two years and has made some serious progress.  His goals have been centered around some fine motor coordination and sensory issues.  He used to be so adverse to certain textures that it would make him gag and choke when he would touch them.  This is a huge factor in his food aversion since purees and anything sticky would make him gag.  We've been working for a long time on touching pureed foods and we had a huge break through this week.  Although it's not with food, the fact that he didn't gag or even freak out when finger paint was all over his hands was huge!!  He actually liked it:)  A big thank you to our awesome therapists who keep pushing him (and me) to meet his goals (these pictures are for you, K).

Filled with gratitude that the Lord continues to develop my kiddos
Amazed at the miracle of finger paint




Journeying On,


June 21, 2012

Thankful Thursday

Sweet time with a gracious and humble saint...also known as Bow:)
('bow' was Addison's first word, so her great-grandmother decided that's what they would call her)

This conversation:
Me: Ethan, did you climb in your bed?
(neither have ever climbed out or in before)
Ethan: Yes!  I need to stay in bed and read my Jesus Bible, Mommy!

 Cousin play


Grassy toes

A challenging message to give thanks

Journeying On,